Saturday, October 2, 2010

Friend or Enemy

It was the first lull of the night. There were a few customers in the store, first bit of a break I'd had since I got to work. My coworker informed me he was going to be going to the vault, our walk in cooler, to fill the shelves after they had been depleted from the hour-long rush we had. I told him to hang on a second while I step outside for a quick cigarette. He complied and I stepped out. I lit up my cigarette and a guy ran around the corner and into the store. While smoking, I looked inside to see that he was making a purchase of a couple of cigars. I saw the money out, so I turned my gaze toward the street watching the people shuffling by.

A car came from around the corner and started to turn down the street. Normally, this wouldn't be a problem except for the fact it was a one way in the opposite direction he was traveling. After nearly hitting two cars, he turned toward the proper direction of traffic. At that time, the running customer booked it out of the store and was crossing the street. The car accelerated in reverse and..

BAM!

The car in question slammed into the guy who was running. He landed in the hood of the trunk. As the car started braking, he slid backward and onto the corner of the curb. The car stopped just short of running over his arm. I pinched the tip of my cigarette, and darted inside, and around the counter. My coworker asked what happened.

"Some jackass just slammed into the guy who just left here."

"I'll go out there and see what I can do to help."

I tossed him my pen and told him to jot down the plate number just in case the guy sped away. The customers who had heard our brief conversation started gathering at out front window looking out at the situation as I'm already on the line with 911 informing them of the situation. After I hung up the phone, a customer asked me what happened exactly. I told them what I knew. At that time, my coworker came in, and I asked what was going on.

"It turns out the driver was a friend of his. He tried messing around y bumping him with the back of the car, but hit the gas a bit too hard and hit him. He seems to be alright, but he did say his chest hurt a bit. He's going to get looked at now."

I sighed and told him I was going back outside to finish my cigarette. No sooner did I go back outside, I saw the car pull away. I lit up up and  took a few drags before I heard sirens in the distance. A squad car came around the corner and looked a bit perplexed. I walked up to him and explained the situation. The cop laughed and said, "At least he doesn't have to pay for an ambulance ride." At that moment a fire truck and ambulance came around the corner. As I continued with my cigarette, he walked over to them and explained the situation. I stepped back in and told my coworker:

"I told you it's going to be one of those nights."

60 comments:

  1. Keep getting juicy stories like these and you will have a book on your hands, honest.

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  2. What a jackass! Who decides to hit their friend with their car as a practical joke in the first place, and then doesn't pay attention to how hard they're hitting the gas! The end is nigh my friends.

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  3. To kind of happened to my friend, except he was laying on the hood of the car and slid off when my other friend stopped short. Unfortunately, the back of his head hit a sewer cap and gave him a huge gash.

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  4. Hell of a narrative. Maybe if you stopped smoking you wouldn't have to deal with all this stuff. Just a thought. :)
    Still, "I just thought I'd tap him with my bumper" is pretty idiotic.

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  5. nice story! that sounds like a jerk thing to do

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  6. Maybe a little more thought should have gone into that one.

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  7. wow that really sucks to be that guy

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  8. gotta suck to be that guy in your story. they're really good. keep it up

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  9. This is a prime example of a joke gone too far. Who on earth would 'pretend' to hit somebody with a car? That's like me 'pretending' to push somebody off the train platform.

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  10. Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.

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  11. good read as always, keep it up- you have a gift

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  12. Oh god, my friends mess around in their cars all the time. It's bound to go wrong one day

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  13. That joke was taken way to far though funny post

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  14. I really want to know why the guy who got hit was in such a rush! I guess idiots have their reasons...

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  15. god dammit some people are stupid, i mean, really.

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  16. Great post!

    looking forward to reading the next one

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  17. I lul'd xD

    I actually love your blog, your stories are so funny lol.

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  18. löl.. crazy stuff..

    but at least it never gets boring :P

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  19. Your posts are so easy and pleasing to read.
    Hope the guy's chest is ok :/

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  20. haha, what a LOVELY friend :P

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  21. are these real lol? are you really a 3rd shit worker?

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  22. @YouNostalgiaYouLose

    As I said in my first post of this Blog, "Whether or not you believe some of them, that's completely up to you. Those who have worked this shift would know quite well that sometimes fact, is stranger the fiction.

    And yes, I am a third shift clerk, if that's what you meant to post.

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  23. i like the ending, you have a great talent for writing lol

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  24. good follow up post to yesterday's

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  25. Some action is better than no action, and hey, more fresh air for you.

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  26. post this type of stuff more!

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  27. That was really well written. Keep more like this coming.

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  28. who the fuck thinks it's funny to "bump" their friend with a car. jesus.

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  29. I enjoyed your point of view in this post

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  30. sounded like a funny night. and I agree square :P I've sat on a friends bonet as he began to drive at like 5-10mph max.. then hopped off and let him go on his way, that was it :P

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  31. I thought for sure it was going to be a heist of some sort, and he was running to get away... Interesting though.

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  32. Just to clear up any confusion, it would seem, after the fact, the the guy who was hit was originally in the car, came to the store, ran out when he had seen said car across the street.

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  33. I liked your perspective in this one... I'm going to have to agree with you

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  34. I'm definitely going to keep reading.

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  35. It's ALWAYS going to be one of those nights.

    And I can't wait to see what other fun adventures you go on during the evenings... :)

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  36. I liked what you said on my blog earlier today... GTL and blogging FTW!

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  37. When it comes to your post, GTL can also stand for "Great Thoughts at Length"... keep it up!

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  38. awh man, i fuckin love these stories

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